Like this:

A couple of days ago I bought my plane ticket to go to Costa Rica for a week in June for my global business class/capstone project. Wait, have I mentioned before that I am going to Costa Rica? I’m not sure. If not, hi! I’m going to Costa Rica in two months! This whole MBA program thing does not entirely suck! And I am saying this after being a zombie at work all week because I am running on approximately 1 hour of sleep a night due to paper writing! Costa Rica!

Anyway, have you bought a plane ticket recently? I travel a fair amount, but I maybe haven’t been looking at my receipts for plane tickets or something. Because yesterday I was forwarding my itinerary to my mom (you know, in case I disappear and someone is all, “well m’aam where was she last” – my mom can check my email and know at least which country I might be in. It’s a start). As I scrolled down to hit “send” on the e-mail I noticed this:

Fare Breakdown Airfare: 387.00 USD U.S. Security Service Fee: 7.50   Costa Rica Tourism Arrival Tax: 15.00   Fuel Surcharge: 240.00   U.S. Customs User Fee: 5.50   U.S. Immigration User Fee: 7.00   U.S. APHIS User Fee: 5.00   U.S. Federal Transportation Tax: 32.20   Costa Rica Common Area User Charge: 4.23   Costa Rica Security Fee: 2.62   U.S. Passenger Facility Charge: 10.50   Per Person Total: 716.55 USD   eTicket Total: 716.55 USD
The airfare you paid on this itinerary totals: 387.00 USD
The taxes you paid on this itinerary total: 329.55 USD

 

I mean, I haven’t been living under a rock or anything, I’m aware that airlines have been having problems, and I drive a car so I am fully aware that gas is expensive, but $240 for fuel surcharge? On a ticket worth $387? This blows my mind, y’all.

By the way, I have an English accent (well, it’s pretty much a mix at this point. English people swear I sound “so American” – which I do – and people here will say after about 5 or 10 minutes of talking to me, “do you have an accent?” – which I do – as long as I don’t sound like Madonna, I don’t really care that I have a hybrid accent), so it’s pretty hilarious when I write or say y’all. I write it far more than I say it, because I am fully aware of how weird it probably sounds coming from me, but sometimes it just makes the most sense.

Anyway, taxes of $329.55 on a $387 ticket? I kind of get the feeling that Continental is laughing all the way to the bank in this situation.

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